The Charming Woman
So Miss Myrtle is going to marry?
What a number of hearts she will break!
There's Lord George, and Tom Brown, and Sir Harry, Who are dying of love
for her sake! '
Tis a match that we all must approve,
Let gossips say all that they can!
For indeed she's a charming woman,
And he's a most fortunate man!
Yes, indeed, she's a charming woman,
And she reads both Latin and Greek,
And I'm told that she solved a problem
In Euclid before she could speak!
Had she been but a daughter of mine,
I'd have taught her to hem and to sew,
But her mother (a charming woman)
Couldn't think of such trifles, you know!
Oh, she's really a charming woman!
But, perhaps, a little too thin;
And no wonder such very late hours
Should ruin her beautiful skin!
And her shoulders are rather too bare,
And her gown's nearly up to her knees,
ut I'm told that these charming women
May dress themselves just as they please!
Yes, she's really a charming woman!
But, I thought, I observed, by the bye,
A something that's rather uncommon,
In the flash of that very bright eye?
It may be a mere fancy of mine,
Though her voice has a very sharp tone,
But I'm told that these charming women
Are inclined to have wills of their own!
She sings like a bullfinch or linnet,
And she talks like an Archbishop too;
Can play you a rubber and win it,
If she's got nothing better to do!
She can chatter of Poor-laws and Tithes,
And the value of labour and land,
'Tis a pity when charming women
Talk of things which they don't understand!
I'm told that she hasn't a penny,
Yet her gowns would make Maradan stare;
And I feel her bills must be many,
But that's only her husband's affair!
Such husbands are very uncommon,
So regardless of prudence and pelf,
But they say such a charming woman
Is a fortune, you know, in herself!
She's brothers and sisters by dozens,
And all charming people, they say!
And several tall Irish cousins,
Whom she loves in a sisterly way.
O young men, if you'd take my advice,
You would find it an excellent plan,
Don't marry a charming woman,
If you are a sensible man!
Helen Selina, Lady Dufferin